


Chaos Who?

by yelllowcurtainss



Category: GOT7, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Crack, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Group Chat Fic, Hijinks & Shenanigans, I Don't Even Know, I hate myself, M/M, Memes, Prank Wars, Texting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-24
Updated: 2019-01-01
Packaged: 2019-07-01 19:22:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,884
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15780483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yelllowcurtainss/pseuds/yelllowcurtainss
Summary: got7 x bts, high school crack au!featuring:* prank wars - choose your fighter: got7 vs. bangtan* JJP and Namjin are the “parents”* yugbamkook are three little shitskook created a group message with chim and taekook: Which one of you fuckers drank my banana milkchim: ... i thought this was gonna be importanttae: lol, why do u always assume it’s uskook: I swear to god Jiminchim: I DON’T EVEN LIKE YOUR SHITTY BANANA MILKtae: it was yugyeom.“hyung, why is jungkook attacking yugyeom” -youngjae to jaebeom





	1. So It Begins...

**Author's Note:**

> Oof... I'm so sorry for this, but I've always wanted to write a crack AU but couldn't decide on how to write it, but luckily (haha luck...) inspiration hit and I decided to make this baby.
> 
> Contact Names:  
> RM - Kim Namjoon  
> frontline - Kim Seokjin  
> suga - Min Yoongi  
> hobi - Jung Hoseok  
> chim - Park Jimin  
> tae - Kim Taehyung  
> kook - Jeon Jungkook
> 
> JB - Im Jaebeom  
> eldest hyung - Mark Tuan  
> papillon - Jackson Wang  
> junior - Park Jinyoung  
> youngjae - Choi Youngjae  
> double b - BamBam  
> gyeom - Kim Yugyeom
> 
> P.S. names will change throughout the story

**double b created a group message with JB, junior, eldest hyung, papillon, youngjae, and gyeom**

 

 **double b:** listen up bitches

 **junior:** Why tf is my contact name junior?

 **eldest hyung:** cause you use to go by junior???

 **junior:** I stopped going by that 2 years ago 

 **gyeom:** change it then.

 **papillon:** ^

 **eldest hyung:** ^

 **double b:** ^^

 **JB:** ^?

 **junior:** All of you suck ass except youngjae

 **youngjae:** why don’t you just change it then?

 **junior:**  Nvm. Fuck you too.

***junior changed ‘junior’ to jinyoung***

**double b:** boring ass name

 **jinyoung:** Fuck you

 **youngjae:** Why does everyone get a nickname but mine’s just youngjae

 **double b:** i was gonna name you otter jae

 **papillon:** Why didn’t you?

 **double b:** idk…

***JB changed ‘youngjae’ to otter jae***

**JB:** Why did we create another group chat? 

 **JB:** We have 5 others

 **eldest hyung:** six actually

 **double b:** we need to get back at the bangtan bitches 

 **jinyoung:** Who??

 **double b:** you know jungkook's group of friends 

 **gyeom:** kim namjoon?

 **gyeom:** kim seokjin?

 **gyeom:** min yoongi?

 **gyeom:** jung hoseok?

 **gyeom:** park jimin?

 **gyeom:** kim taehyung?

 **gyeom:** jeon jungkook?

 **otter jae:** BTS!!!

 **JB:** What

 **otter jae:**???

 **JB:** Why'd you say BTS after Yugyeom said Jeon Jungkook

 **otter jae:** I did???

 **JB:** Are you on crack or something

 **otter jae:** No? 

 **papillon:** OK... continue bambam

 **papillon:** What are we going to do to them?

 **double b:** we need to prank them hard

 **jinyoung:** Why?

 **gyeom:** jungkook and jimin stole bambam's clothes from the locker room so he has to chase them around the school

 **eldest hyung:** that's not even that bad

 **double b:** keep listening

 **gyeom:** he was wrapped in a towel but jungkook stepped on it and he flashed his bio teacher

 **eldest hyung:** SAkncdlvwivwfo

 **double b:** now i have detention for a week 

 **JB:** It's okay because BamBam is not that big

 **double b:** how do you know?

 **double b:** HoW dO yOu KnOw I'm NoT bIg

***JB has left the group chat***

***jinyoung has left the group chat***  

***eldest hyung has left the group chat***

***papillon has left the group chat***

**double b:** hey guys, come on

***otter jae has left the group chat***

**gyeom:** i guess it's just us ://

***double b has left the group chat***

**gyeom:** fucker

 

 

 

**chim to kook**

 

 **chim:**  do you think bambam hates us?

 **kook:**  nah he could never hate me

 **kook:**  but you might want to watch your back

 **chim:**  stfu and go suck his dick already

 **kook:**  read 13:52

 **chim:**  BITCH YOU CANT JUST TEXT A READ RECEIPT THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS

 **kook:** read 13:53

 

 

 

****RM created a group message with frontline, suga, hobi,  chim, tae, and kook**  
**

 

 ** **RM:**** Jin and I are going to the grocery store what do you guys want for movie night?

 **kook:** lube

 **suga:** grow up 

 **kook:** i don't want to be an old man like hyung

 **suga:** you're lucky i'm not in the same room as you rn

 **hobi:** Can you pick up some seafood?

 **RM:** I was hoping for meat

 **frontline:** Actually seafood sounds great

 **RM:** Hey Jin, can we get meat?

 **frontline:** But Seafood...

 **RM:** But Meat...

 **frontline:** Seafood

 **RM:** Meat

 **frontline:** SEAFOOD  
  
**RM:** MEAT

 **tae:** goddamnit hobi you got our parents to fight

 **RM:** Parents?

 **frontline:** We aren't fighting.

 **suga:** aren't you guys right next to each other???

 **frontline:**...

 **RM:** I guess we can get seafood, but only for you babe.

 **frontline:** Did I ever tell you I love you?

 **RM:** Did I ever tell you I love you more??

 **chim:** i'm going to vomit

**tae: ^^**

**kook:** i'm gauging my eyes out rn

 **hobi:** Wait, gauge mine out first

***RM named the group chat 'Movie Night'***

**kook:** can i invite bambam and yugyeom over???

 **suga:** no. 

 **kook:** wtf... why not

 **suga:** i said so

 **chim:** i don't really want to see bambam again after seeing him naked

 **hobi:** WHAT?!?!?!?!

 **chim:** jungkook took bambam's towel and made him flash a teacher

 **tae:** lol

 **frontline:** Okay time to  **HAJIMA**

 **tae:** i heard rumors from mingyu that jaebeom and yugyeom were talking about a prank bambam is trying to pull on us.

 **hobi:** It's all 7 of them actually

 **tae:** ALL SEVEN OF THEM ARE GOING TO TEAM UP AGAINST US?

 **hobi:** Uh huh

 **kook:** this is war

 **kook:** 7 against 7

 

"Why do you need so many balloons?" -cashier to bambam

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tbh i'm just trying to stay up till 4 so I can see bighit drop the 'IDOL' mv
> 
> P.S. this is just the intro chapter. after this chapter they will start to get longer. ALSO btw their personalities are kinda similar to the real life members, but also very different so don't start attacking me.
> 
> ALSO every chapter is gonna end with a shitty quote of what's going to come


	2. Prank 1 - Got7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IDOL was lit my dudes... go stream it or even just check it out if you haven't 
> 
> ALSO...
> 
> Got7 is coming back around the end of September and they are producing/writing all the songs, so go support them A SHIT TON when the album releases

**double b created a group message with JB, jinyoung, eldest hyung, papillon, otter jae, and gyeom**

 

 **double b:** stay in the chat this bitches

 **double b:** the first person to leave will suffer the consequences

 

***double b named the conversation ‘revenge on jungkook’s group of friends’***

 

 **jinyoung:** You’re talkig this prank way too seriously

 **eldest hyung:** why cant you just suck jungkook’s dick and go

 **gyeom:** HEY

 **papillon:** We all know bam’s too much of a coward to actually make a move on jungkook

 **gyeom:** STOPPPPPP

 **otter jae:** More like he can’t decide whether or not he should go for him or gyeomie

 **gyeom:** wait what

***double b has left the conversation***

**jinyoung:** Well I guess Bam’s going to have to face tHe CoNsEqUeNcEs

 **gyeom:** someone explain

 **gyeom:** p l e a s e

***gyeom added double b to the conversation***

**JB:** Ah, young love  <3

 **eldest hyung:** bitch

 **eldest hyung:** i’m older than you

 **JB:** Yet you haven’t had a relationship with someone for over 6 months

 **eldest hyung:** dick

 **JB:** That’s what I give jinyoung every night

***eldest hyung has left the conversation***

**jinyoung:** coward

***double b added eldest hyung to the conversation***

**double b:** guys

 **double b:** stop

 **double b:** we need to figure this prank out

 **gyeom:** ^^

 **jinyoung:** Literally no one cares but you two

 **double b:** because of that im making you get the supplies from the grocery store

 **jinyoung:** Umm

 **jinyoung:** No

 

***double b messaged jinyoung***

**double b:** do it or i’ll expose you for your bucket hat fetish

 **jinyoung:** You wouldn’t

 **double b** : try me

 **jinyoung:** Fuck you

 

**“revenge on jungkook’s group of friends” chat**

**jinyoung:** Fine.

 **papillon:** Bam what’d you say to jinyoung

 **double b:** I DIDNT DO ANYTIGM

 **eldest hyung:** we all know you something happened

 **jinyoung:** Someone needs to come with me

 **jinyoung:** I’m not getting this shit by myself

 **otter jae:** I’ll come

 **jinyoung:** This is why you’re my favorite

 **JB:** I thought I was your favorite...

 **jinyoung:** ¯\\_( ツ)_/¯

 **papillon:** Care to explain the prank Bambam?

 **double b** : we’re gonna be inviting

 **double b:** SHIT

 **double b:** we need a name for jungkook’s group of friends

 **double b:** i can’t keep calling them jungkook’s friends

 **gyeom:** what about the bitch gang

 **papillon:** I like that

 **otter jae:** Got7?

 **papillon:** That doesn’t even make sense

 **otter jae:** And bitch gang is suppose to be better??

 **papillon:** What dumbass group would be named got7

 **otter jae:** WHAT GROUP WOULD BE NAMED BTCH GANG

 **eldest hyung:** @bambam didn’t you call them the ‘bangtan bitches’ yesterday

 **double b:** idk

 **double b:** maybe?

 **eldest hyung:** why’d you call them that

 **double b:** jungkook said something about them being bulletproof

 **double b:** idk i thought he was high

 **double b:** i guess it just stuck

 **eldest hyung:** i say we vote for bangtan bitches

 **otter jae:** I approve

 **gyeom:** ^

 **papillon:** ^

 **jinyoung:** Sure

 **JB:** ^^

 

***double b named the conversation ‘revenge on bangtan bitches’***

 

 **gyeom:** anyways

 **gyeom:** bambam and i are going to invite the bangtan bitches to hang out at our house

 **gyeom:** once they come in we’ll attack them with water balloons, balloons filled with colored cornstarch, and slime filled balloons

 **otter jae:** Aren’t we going to have to clean it up then?

 **otter jae:** It’s still our house

 **papillon:** I’m not cleaning it up

 **otter jae:** ^

 **double b:** ldjakxka fuck

 **double b:** i didn’t think about that

 **papillon:** What if we get them to invite us to their house??

 **otter jae:** Doesn’t it seem a little mean to wreck their house like that

 **gyeom:** NAH

 **otter jae** : I just don’t want them to be pissed at us

 **otter jae:** It could cause problems

***gyeom removed otter jae from the conversation***

**JB:** BITCH

 **JB:** NOT THE NICE ONE

 **papillon:** Rude

***JB added otter jae to the conversation***

**otter jae:** Fuck you Yugyeom

 **gyeom:** it’s settled then

 **gyeom:** i’m gonna text jungkook rn

 

***gyeom messaged kook***

**gyeom:** hey jungkook

 **gyeom:** i was wondering if out friend groups could hang out sometime soon

***read 11:21***

 

**“revenge on bangtan bitches” chat**

**gyeom:** THE BITCH LEFT ME ON READ

 **double b:** HAHAHAHA FUCKING LOSER

 

 

**meanwhile—**

 

**“Movie Night” chat**

**kook:** YUGYEOM TEXTED ME

 **suga:** who?

 **kook:** KIM YUGYEOM

 **kook:** MY CRUSH???

 **suga:** who

 **chim:** i thought you liked bambam

 **tae:** he likes both

 **tae:** he calls them “yugbam”

 **kook:** STOP ATTACKIG ME

 **kook:** MY CRUSH FUCKING TEXTED ME

 **kook:** BE HAPPY FOR ME

 **hobi:** I would be

 **hobi:** But like THEY ARE YOUR FUCKING BEST FRIENDS

 **RM:** I’m confused

 **RM:** Why is Kookie freaking out then if he’s best friends with the pair

 **kook:** HE TEXTED ME PERSONALLY THIS TIME

 **kook:** 1 ON 1

 **kook:** WE ALWAYS TEXT IN A GC WITH US 3

 **kook:** WAIT FUCK

 **kook:** I FEEL LIKE IM CHEATING ON BAMBAM

 **tae:** oh my fuck jungkook

 **tae:** what did he text you

 **kook:** he wanted all of us to hang out with all 7 of them

 **chim:** we haven’t done that in so long

 **frontline:** Let’s invite them over for on Friday night

 **suga:** but that’s movie night...

 **frontline:** What’s wrong with that?

 **suga:** 1\. we cant fit that many people in our living room

 **suga:** 2\. we can barely decide on a movie with us seven

 **suga:** 3\. that group is VERY messy

 **suga:** 4\. you hate messes

 **frontline:** OKAY I GOT IT

 **frontline:** We’ll invite them over to just ketchup

 **hobi:** was that a pun...

 **chim:** i can hear jin laughing from the bathroom

 **hobi:** are you on the toilet right now

 **kook:** jimin are you taking a fucking shit

 **chim:** no

 **chim:** i’m taking a piss

***RM has left the conversation***

***kook added RM to the conversation***

**kook** : can’t escape us bitch

 **tae:** hey kookie

 **kook:** yes

 **tae:** did you perhaps take a moment to realize you left yugyeom on read

 **kook:** ...

 **kook:** no i didn’t

 **tae:** yes you did

 **suga:** check your phone, dumbass

 **kook:** LANXKAJZKWILDF

 **kook:** ABORT ABORT

 

***read 11:21***

**kook:** fuck

 **kook:** sorry gyeom

 **kook:** if you’re able to jin is letting everyone come over on saturday night

 **gyeom:** hell yeah

 **gyeom:** see ya then

 

**“revenge on bangtan bitches” chat**

**gyeom:** we’re in boys

 **gyeom:** saturday night

 

—

 

 “Okay. What do we have to get again??” Jinyoung sighed while scanning the items on the shelf at the grocery store.

 “Yugyeom said we’re filling some balloons up with water, cornstarch and slime. So we need cornstarch and slime ingredients.”

“Okay, but what the fuck is in slime.”

“I’ll text him and ask.”

 

***otter jae messaged gyeom***

**otter jae:** Gyeomie

 **gyeom:** what

 **otter jae:** How do you make slime?

 **gyeom:** i think it’s like glue, contact solution, and shaving cream???

 **gyeom:** food coloring too

 **otter jae:** Ok. Thanks

 

“We need glue, contact solution, and shaving cream.”

“We. Are. At. The. Grocery. Store.”

The two groaned simultaneously before Youngjae spoke up, “We’re gonna have to run to the drug store after we get the cornstarch and food coloring.”

“How should I kill Yugyeom?”

“Don’t kill Yugyeom,”

“No, I will kill Yugyeom,” 

“Jesus. What the fuck are you on?”

 

—

**got7 kitchen**

 

“Okay who wants to kill the balloons with cornstarch?” Bambam asks.

“Why don’t you?”

“Because I don’t want to,”

“No one wants t-,”

“Jaebeom-ah” Yugyeom interupts.

*insert shook jaebeom jpeg*

“He said Jaebeom-ah,” Youngjae shouts over the commotion.

“Yugyeom has finally...”

“NOOOO~~~” Yugyeom shouts.

“... decided to drop formalities,” Jinyoung says through his laughter.

“I was trying to call for Bambam...” Yugyeom states.

“Who think Yugyeom should be the one putting the cornstarch in the balloons?”

Every member besides Yugyeom’s hand raises, “Fuck you guys.”

“Start filling them Cinderella,”

“Yugyeomrella,”

“That’s not even funny,”

 

Eventually all the water balloons and cornstarch filled balloons were complete but Jackson, Bambam, and Mark were having a somewhat difficult time on the slime.

 

“ITS IN MY HAIR-“ Bambam says while frantically trying to pull it out.

“STOP COMPLAINING,” Jackson shouts.

“I JUST DYED MY HAIR TWO DAYS AGO,”

“WELL YOU’RE GOING TO BE BALD IN A YEAR, SO IT DOESN’T MATTER ANYWAYS,”

“HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSE TO PUT SLIME INSIDE A FUCKING BALLOON,” Mark screams. “DO WE HAVE A FUCKING FUNNEL OR SOMETHING??”

“WHY WOULD WE HAVE A FUCKING FUNNEL? WE DONT EVEN HAVE A FRYING PAN,”

“GUYS ITS NOT COMING OUT,”

“THATS THE LEAST OF OUT WORRIES RIGHT NOW BAMBAM,”

“DO YOU NOT REMEMBER THIS WAS YOUR PRANK IDEA?”

“MY HAIRS MORE IMPORTANT THAN MESSING WITH JUNGKOOK’S FRIENDS,”

“FINE ILL GET THE SCISSORS,” Jackson says before running out of the room.

“JACKSON I WILL KILL YOU IF YOU COME NEAR ME,”

 

**< end of chapter  >**

—

***papillon messaged double b***

**papillon:** What’d you blackmail jinyoung with

 **double b:** i can’t tell you

 **papillon:** I’ll give you whatever you want

 **double b:** 50 bucks and my laundry for a month

 **papillon:** deal

 **double b:** bucket hat fetish

 

**“revenge on bangtan bitches” chat**

***papillon changed ‘jinyoung’ to bucket-hat69***

**bucket-hat69:** fuck you bambam

 **JB:** ...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for staying with me for another chapter!! i'm trying to think of new ideas for some of the contact names, so if you have any ideas write em in the comments below


	3. Ze Aquarium

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If only Namjoon didn't have the tendency to break things...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the wait, but school's not being very nice. fortunately i was home sick today so i spent a portion of my day finishing this chapter
> 
> also go stream lullaby: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9RUeTYiJCyA
> 
> they exceeded all my standards, plus they look fine af

**“Movie Night” chat**

**frontline:** What movie do you guys want to watch tonight?

**suga** : children of the corn

**hobi:** FUCK NO

**tae:** BITCH

**tae:** OPJSKFL;IHHJ;wakjl

**frontline:** Let’s choose a family friendly movie!!

**frontline:** I’ve heard of a good movie called the bee movie

**frontline:** And who doesn’t want to learn about bees

**chim:** so who’s gonna tell him?

**frontline** : Tell me what?

**hobi:** Let’s watch black panther

**suga:** sounds good

**tae:** i heard that’s suppose to be good

**chim:** i’m down

**kook:** i’ve already seen it

**hobi:** WHEN

**kook:** with bambam and yugyeom

**suga:** fucker

**RM:** We could watch mission impossible?

**tae:** which one?

**RM:** Rouge Nation

**kook:** i’ve already seen that

**RM:** Really Jungkook?

**kook:** XD

**suga:** why don’t we just watch a movie and if kookie has already seen it we just make him watch it again

**RM:** I like that idea

**chim:** me too

**frontline:** Okay. That’s what we’re doing.

**tae:** i want to see black panther

**hobi:** Same

**chim:** i really don’t care what we watch

**frontline:** So it’s settled. I’ll order it rn

**frontline:** Everyone be home by 6

**tae:** ok mom

**frontline:** What did you just call me?

 

**— A wee bit later**

 

**“Movie Night” chat**

**frontline:** Change of plans.

**suga:** what happened

**frontline:** Namjoon broke the dvd player, so we can’t watch the movie.

**tae:** DAD

**RM** : Why do you keep doing that?

**tae:** doing what?

**RM:** Calling Seokjin mom and me dad?

**chim:** why do you keep breaking things?????

**chim** : owo

**suga:** whats owo

**kook:** hyungs are turning old

**hobi:** What are we going to do instead of movie night then

**RM:** We were thinking of going to the opera

**suga:** ...

**kook:** ur joking right?

**kook:** excuse me but it’s suppose to be fun

**frontline:** My gosh. Who raised you to be such brats?

**hobi:** How about we all vote on an activity instead of arguing

**RM:** Fine. Suggest two other ideas

**suga:** an aquarium would be cool

**kook:** p a i n t b a l l

**RM:** Alright

**RM:** We have our 3 ideas.

**RM:** Who wants to go to the opera?

**frontline:** Me

**RM:** I’m counting my vote

**hobi:** I kinda want to...

**tae:** BETRAYER

 

**—**

***tae created a group chat with kook, suga, and chim***

**tae:** hey fuckers

**tae:** we need to plan this so we don’t have to go to the opera

**kook:** i

**kook:** want

**kook:** paintball

**chim:** LITERALLY NO ONE GIVES A DAMN FOR YOUR FUCKIG PAINTBALL BUT YOU

**tae:** speak for yourself chim

**tae:** i want to paintball

**kook:** YASSSS TAEKOOK

**tae:** what

**kook:** ???

**tae:** whats taekook

**kook:** our ship name?

**tae:** don’t you like yugbam

**kook:** taekook— it’s platonic

**kook:** it’s just a meme

**tae:** uh huh

**suga:** hey guk

**kook:** i don’t like where this is going...

**suga:** remember when you had a HUGGGEE crush on taehyung

**suga:** AND would rant to me about how beautiful he looked

**suga:** EVERYDAY

***kook has left the conversation***

**tae:** EXCUSE ME

**tae:** WHEN WAS THIS

**suga:** my lips are sealed

**chim:** you clearly don’t know what that means since you just spilled one of jungkook’s big ass secrets

**suga:** do you need me to spill some of yours

**chim:** ur a monster

***suga added kook to the conversation***

**suga:** so it’s decided!!

**suga:** we’re going to the aquarium

 

—

**“Movie Night” chat**

**RM:** Who wants to go paint balling?

**hobi:** I believe jungkook does

**kook:** no i don’t

**hobi:** Didn’t you suggest it?

**kook:** nope

**RM:** Hey kook

**kook:** yes?

**RM:** Are you feeling OK?

**kook:** mhm

**RM:** OK then...

**RM:** Who wants to go to the aquarium?

**chim:** me

**chim:** uwu

**frontline:** What are these things you’re sending??

**chim:** OWO

**tae:** STOP

**suga:** i suggested it so count me

**suga:** unlike some people i know how to stick with my ideas

**kook:** asshole

**kook:** aquariums are cool, ok?

**kook:** so count my vote

**tae:** yeah i guess i will vote that too then

**tae:** since ANYTHING is better than the opera

**suga:** 4 to 3

**suga:** aquarium

 

**— @ ze aquarium**

 

“Alright. Who’s buying the tickets??”

“I thought you were going to???”

“Do I look like a fucking paycheck to you? Buy it yourself, Jimin”

Jimin sighs in the exasperation and whispers to Jungkook, “Jin must’ve slept on the wrong side of the bed.”

“I HEARD THAT,”

“WELL AT LEAST YOUR EARS STILL WORK, OLD MAN,”

“PARK JIMIN GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE RIGHT NOW,”

“ONLY IF YOU CAN CATCH ME BITCH,” Jimin yells while running away.

“Hyung, people are looking at us…” Hoseok tries to interject.

“Does it look like I care?”

“You know what?” Namjoon groans as he walks up the front desk, “I’ll pay for the fucking tickets.”

“Hello, How may I help you?”

“I’d like to buy two adult tickets and five child tickets,”

“Sir… Children are ages 0-12,”

“Oh, we—“

“But I can give you a discount if you buy over 10 tickets,”

“Yeah… I guess I’ll buy 10,”

“Alright, your total will be ₩79113.18”

Once his purchase was finished and he rounded up all the boys he tells them about the 10 tickets, “Alright, we can invite 3 more people. Does anyone have ideas who they want to invite?”

“BAMBAM AND YUGYEOM,” Jungkook screeches.

“Jesus Jungkook. You’d think you would be able to keep your dick in your pants for a day,” Yoongi says in annoyance.

“I don’t think it’s fair if we invited three people from that friend group and not everyone else,”

“Hoseok’s right what would the other four guys think?”

“I didn’t buy 10 tickets for three of them to go unused,”

“Let’s just text them asking if anyone wants to go to the aquarium and that we have three extra tickets, but if anyone else wants to go they have to pay. It’s not ideal but at least they all have a chance to go,”

“Someone text them,”

 

**tae created a group message with JB, eldest hyung, papillon, bucket-hat69, otter jae, double b, gyeom, RM, frontline, suga, hobi, chim, and kook**

 

***tae named the chat fishy fishy***

**tae:** welcome to the 76th hunger games

**gyeom:** what is this?

**tae:** are you illiterate

**tae:** i just said it was the hunger games

**hobi:** Taehyung chill

**hobi** : Do you guys want to meet us at the aquarium?

**bucket-hat69:** Are you saying we’d have to see you guys two days in a row?

**bucket-hat69:** Today and tomorrow?

**JB:** <3 Tomorrow, Today

**bucket-hat69:** I love you

**JB:** I love you too

**chim:** what tf am i watching

**chim:** also why is Jinyoung’s name bucket-hat69

**bucket-hat69:** If any of you fuckers tell him I will murder you.

***bucket-hat69 changed “bucket-hat69” to jinyoung***

**eldest hyung:** sorry boys

**eldest hyung:** i have basketball practice in an hour

**gyeom:** will jungkook be there?

**double b:** ^^^^

**chim:** 0w0

**frontline:** No.

**double b:** oh then eh…

**kook:** WHAT THE FUCK JIN

**kook:** IM SITTING RIGHT NEXT TO YOU

**kook:** YES I AM GOING

  
**kook:** IM ACTUALLY HERE RIGHT NOW

**suga:** like i said kook

**suga:** calm your dick

**tae:** we only have 3 tickets so…

**tae:** sucks for the 4th person

**JB:** Jinyoung and I are going on a date tonight, so we’ll pass

**tae:** so mark is out

**tae:** and jinyoung and jaebeom are out

 

***tae kicked eldest hyung, JB, and jinyoung from the group chat***

 

**tae:** so jackson, yugyeom, youngjae, and bambam are left

**tae:** one of you needs to

**tae:** l e a v e

**papillon:** Taehyung are you okay

**hobi:** Just leave him Jackson

**hobi:** He gets high off this

**papillon:** I mean I’d be down to see some fish

**double b:** im only going to see jungkook

**gyeom:** same

**tae:** youngjae?

**otter jae:** I want to go too

**otter jae:** I really want to see some jellyish

**tae:** alright

**tae:** i will ask a question and who ever is the furthest from the answer gets cut

**otter jae:** Why can’t one of us just buy another ticket there?

**tae:** THAT NOT HOW IT WORKS

**otter jae:** …

**tae:** alright

**tae:** what’s my favorite drink?

**otter jae:** Sprite?

**double b:** COCK

**gyeom:** coke

**double b:** cock

**double b:** cock*

**papillon:** Coke.

**double b:** COKE****

**tae:** it’s coke!!!

**tae:** since 2/4 guessed coke and youngjae guess sprite

**tae:** they get the tickets!!!

**double b:** i guessed coke???

**tae:** you literally said cock 3 times

**double b:** ever heard of auto correct

***tae kicked double b from the group chat***

**tae:** y’all ready to see the fishies??

**papillon:** Ur sadistic

**tae:** :).

 

**—back @ ze aquarium**

 

20 minutes later Jackson, Youngjae, and Yugyeom arrived and they all headed in.

 

“Hey, Yugyeom,” Jungkook says while ditching Hoseok to walk with Yugyeom.

“What’s up man,”

“Nothing mu— is Bambam not with you?”

“Oh… Did you not see the texts?”

“I don’t really check my phone too often,”

“Your buddy Taehyung kicked him out,”

“What.” Jungkook’s flatlines, his whole demeanor changing.

“Yeah… look at the chat with all of us in it,” Yugyeom says while hanging Jungkook his phone.

After scrolling through the chat for about 30 seconds Jungkook takes a minute to compose himself, “Gyeom, will you give me a second?”

“Sure. I’ll be with Jackson!”

 

***pray for tae guys***

 

“WHAT THE FUCK TAEYUNG,” Jungkook shouts while grabbing Tae’s shirt and pushing him into the wall.

“Mmm kinky,” Taehyung smirks.

“DONT ‘Mmm kinky me’ YOU KICKED THE BAM OUT OF YUGBAM,”

“So? Yugyeom is still here,”

“THEY’RE THEIR OWN UNIT,”

“JEON JUNGKOO-”

“KIM TAEHYUNG DO YOU REALIZE I LIKE BOTH OF THEM?”

“JUNGK-“

  
“THEY ARE A WHOLE. YOU MUST LIKE BOTH OF THEM OR YOUR NOT A FAN AT ALL,”

  
“WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?”

“OT1 FANS CAN SUCK ASS,”

“BUT YOU’RE NOT A FAN; YOU’RE THEIR FRIEND,”

“I CAN’T JUST—“ Jungkook sighs, “Yugyeom by himself I’m too awkward. I need both of them here to be comfortable,”

“Just be yourself Kook. We’ve been friends with that group for years. You know more about them then I know about you. You can do it,”

“Thanks, hyung,”

“No problem Kookie, but please stop pressing me against the wall,”

“Sorr-”

“THERE THEY ARE,” Someone shouts from across the room while a group of security guards advanced towards them.

“Shit,” They say simultaneously while starting to run away.

“Find Namjoon and the others,” Taehyung shouts, “I’ll get Jackson, Youngjae, and Yugyeom.”

“Why can’t I get them…” Jungkook whines.

“NOWS NOT THE TIME,”

 

**CHAPTER END**

 

***eldest hyung created a group message with JB, jinyoung, and double b***

**eldest hyung:** you guys won't believe this

**jinyoung:** What?

**eldest hyung:** THE BANGTAN BITCHES GOT KICKED OUT OF THE AQUARIUM

**double b:** WHAT HAPPENED  
  


**eldest hyung:** THE BEST THING IS THAT YOUNGJAE, JACKSON, AND YUGYEOM DIDNT AND THEY GOT IT ALL ON VIDEO

**JB:** No way

**JB:** Why'd they get kicked out

**eldest hyung:** jackson said they caused a "disruptance" to the fish

**double b:** you know what this means?

**double b:** we have more ammo for the war

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright! this chapter is slightly questionable... tae and yoongi are lowkey sadastic at some parts and AHHHH. anyways next chapter will have the yugbamkook progress (especially with bambam), hopekook will be sent to detention (this may not be next chapter but ITS GONNA HAPPEN IN THE FUTURE) , and got7 is going to go through with their prank.
> 
> thanks for staying with me <3


	4. Detention

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chong! Jujun! Balsa!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i don't know what the fuck this chapter is but here you go and i hope you enjoy. 
> 
> go support got7's "miracle". it's the softest cutest song you'll ever here. 
> 
> Happy Holidays!!!
> 
> *ignore any typos or grammatical mistakes*

**s a t u r d a y**

 

DING DONG

 

“SOMEONE GET THE DOOR,” Seokjin yells from the bathroom.

 

“TAEHYUNG,”

 

“WHY ME???”

 

“STOP SCREAMING IMBECILES”

 

“I’LL GET IT,” Jungkook shouts while running through the house to get the door.

 

When he finally opens the door he’s greeted with the sight of Jaebeom and Jinyoung.

 

“Where’s Bambam and Yugyeom?”

 

“Nice to see you too,” Jinyoung mutters.

 

“We drove separately. Everyone else will becoming shortly,” Jaebeom tells him.

 

“There’s some food in the kitchen if you want,”

 

A few minutes later the doorbell rang again.

 

“I GOT IT,” Jungkook screamed while dashing through the living room.

  
“Why do I feel like I’ve seen this before,” Jimin chimes in which received a glare from Namjoon and Yoongi.

 

As everyone came piling into the house, so did the chaos. So much was happening. Namjoon and Jackson were chatting about a song they wanted to produce together. Jimin and Hoseok were discussing school life with Youngjae,. Jungkook, Yugyeom, and Bambam were together (as always). Mark was bonding with Seokjin about being the oldest. Jinyoung and Jaebeom were ignoring everyone else and Yoongi and Taehyung were setting up a game.

 

As the night was coming to an end Bambam finally decided to give the cue.

 

**“revenge on bangtan bitches” chat**

**double b:** it’s time.

 **double b:** gyeom come to the car with me

 **gyeom:** meet you there

 **otter jae:** I still think this is a bad idea

 **papillon:** Yeah

 **papillon:** We’re all having so much fun rn

 **eldest hyung:** i didn’t spend 2 hours trying to get slime in a balloon for us not to do it

 **double b:** it even got in my hair

 **eldest hyung:** and bambam loves his hair

 **JB:** You guys are psychos

 **papillon:** Facts

 

***papillon named the conversation ‘psychos’***

 

 **gyeom:** rood

 **jinyoung:** *Rude

 **gyeom:** shut up bucket hat fetish

 **jinyoung:** Grow up

 **JB:** ^^

 **double b:** i’m going to the car now

 **double b:** meet me by the front door

 **double:** everyone grab a ballon and throw

 

_**Ready… Aim… Fire…** _

 

 ***insert hardcore battle music*** (or not today, whatever…)

 

“ATTACK,” The horde of Got7 members yell while running into the house, hands holding balloons.

 

“AGHHHH WHAT THE FUCK,” Jimin shouts after getting hit with a flour filled balloon.

 

“LANGUAGE” Seokjin retorts before getting hit with a slime filled balloon, “MY HAIR”.

 

Bambam and Yugyeom had it out for Jungkook and started annihilating him with balloons. When they finally ran out balloons Jungkook was wet and covered in flour and slime. “I’ll get you guys back.”

 

“Good luck Jungkook-ah,” Yugyeom said through his laughter before giving Bambam a high five.

 

Through all the chaos was a kind soul. Choi Youngjae. As Got6 were coming for the throats of BTS, there lay Youngjae quietly cleaning up some of the mess.

 

Finally when the last balloon was thrown Got7 quickly ran away, leaving the members of Bts shocked.

 

“We’re gonna get those fuckers back,” Namjoon grits out.

 

“Woah, calm down dad,”

 

“Taehyung, WHY DO YOU KEEP CALLING ME THAT?”

 

Seokjin puts his hand on Namjoon’s shoulder, “We’ll decide a plan once we clean all this up. Okay?”

 

“Okay, Jin.”

—

 

***hobi messaged kook***

**hobi:** JUNGKOOK

 **hobi:** JEON JUNGKOOK

 **hobi:** JUNGKOOOOOKKKKK

 **hobi:** I CAN SEE YOU LEAVING ME ON READ

 **hobi:** Ugh fine, i’ll text jiminie instead

 **kook:** WAIT

 **kook:** what’s up bro

 **hobi:** I need help

 **kook:** not leaving much up to interpretation there

 **hobi:** Shut up

 **hobi:** I have that chem test tomorrow and I need your help

 **kook:** i cant help besides cheating

 **hobi:** Exactly…

 **kook:** you’ve never cheated in your life

 **hobi:** So?

 **kook:** fine

 **kook:** but if we get in trouble you owe me a BIG one

 **hobi:** Deal.

 

5th period. Chemistry. Hoseok has been nervous the whole day and now here he was. He was gonna cheat for the first time in his life. Jungkook had taken the test 2nd period and had sent him the answers. Hoseok had written all the answers on a small piece of paper hidden in his sleeve. He felt guilty. He really did, but a grade is more important than his morality. Unfortunately, Hoseok was too strung up in his test that he didn’t see the messages he was receiving from Jungkook.

—

 

***kook messaged hobi***

**kook:** FUCK

 **kook:** ABORT ABORT ABORT

 **kook:** HOBIIIIIII

 **kook:** SHE KNOWS

 **kook:** FUCK

 **kook:** IM SORRY

 **kook:** DON’T USE THOSE ANSWERS

 **kook:** JUST GUESS

 **kook:** UGHkjalfhksafjsgllsdk

 

**— two days later**

 

Hoseok was walking to room 228W when suddeny he felt someone hit his head.

 

“What the fu- JUNGKOOK” he shouted in surprise.

 

“Shouldn’t you be going home???”

 

“Actually..Ms. Yun asked to speak to me after class because of your shitty answers, so I got detention,”

 

“Big oof,”

 

“Asshole,” Hoseok mutters

 

“Anyways mind if I join you?” Hoseok looked at the younger in confusion, “I got detention too.”

 

“Seriously??”

 

“Yup,”

 

As they arrived to their destination they were met by a familiar face. Yugyeom.

 

“Jungkook, did you know he was going to be here?”

 

“I mean not today,”

 

“What do we do h…” Hoseok trailed off when he realized Jungkook had left him to sit next to Yugyeom. “That fucker.”

 

**hobi created a group message wtith RM, frontline, suga, chim, and tae**

**hobi:** GUYS

 **hobi:** Jungkook just ditched me for Yugyeom

 **chim:** GET IT JUNGKOOK  
**chim:** that slut is wild

 **tae:** send pictures

 **RM:** Where’s Bambam in all of this?

 **hobi:** Im assuming he didnt get detention because hes not here

 **chim:** i’m sad now

 **chim:** i need yugbamkook

 **frontline:** I’m annoyed

 **RM:** Why?

 **frontline:** Those morons ruined our house.

 **RM:** It’s okay honey.

 **frontline:** NO IT’S NOT

 **frontline:** We need to get them back.

 **RM:** No.

 **chim:** i like where this is going

 **RM:** No.

 **hobi:** GUYS YUGYEOM AND JUNGKOOK ARE KISSING  
**tae:** WHAT???

 **hobi:** ISNT THERE SUPPOSE TO BE A TEACHER IN HERE

 **hobi:** I WANNA PUKE

 **suga:** what the fuck is happening

 **suga:** leave me and my phone alone

***suga has left the group chat***

**tae:** WHERES MY PICTURES???

 **tae:** HOBI???

 **hobi:** Im sorry but thats not gonna happen

 **tae:** HOBI?

 **tae:** HOBI

 **tae:** HOBBBII

 **tae:** JHOPPPEEEEE  
***suga entered the group chat***

 **suga:** JHOPPPPPPPPPEEEE

***suga has left the group chat***

**tae:** JUNG HOSEOK

 **tae:** HOSEOK???

 **frontline:** He’s meditating guys.

 **chim:** he’s died

 **hobi:** IS JUNGKOOK A FUCKING VAMPIRE CAUSE HES BITING YUGYEOMS NECK?

 **hobi:** DOES HE KNOW WHERE LIPS ARE

 **RM:** No one tell him.

 

**“Movie Night” chat**

**kook:** i just got the best idea for a prank

 

**— end**

 

***RM messaged frontline***

**RM:** Honey, I just got the best idea of how to prank them

 **frontline:** How?

 **RM:** What if we sneak into their house and put sticky notes all over their walls?

 **frontline:** That sounds like a terrible idea

 **RM:** What if we write mean things on them?

 **frontline:** NO

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next update: 10 years later


	5. JJP to the Rescue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jinyoung and Jaebeom are off to help Bambam get hitched.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm in love with this chapter and since i'm on winter break i wrote this in two days. really, i don't know what to say for this note, so ENJOY.

***jinyoung messaged JB***

**jinyoung:** Jaebeom

 **jinyoung:** I think something is wrong with Bambam

 **JB:** Why do you think that?

 **jinyoung:** He hasn’t said anything stupid all day

 **JB:** What do you classify as “stupid”?

 **jinyoung:** HE HASN’T DABBED ALL DAY

 **jinyoung:** ORHAS MADE A BLACK PANTHER REFERENCE

 **JB:** Fuck

 **JB:** BRB

 

***JB messaged papillon***

**JB:** What’s up with Bambam?

 **papillon:** Jungkook and Yugyeom are sucking each other off without him

 **JB:** Too much information

 **papillon:** YOU ASKED

  
**JB:** Go back to your Idol producer friends

 **papillon:** Are you still stuck on that…

***JB changed ‘papillon’ to traitor***

**traitor:** Cold

 

***JB messaged jinyoung***

**JB:** Bambam is upset about Yugs and Jungkook

 **JB:** Yugyeom and Jungkook’s relationship is _advancing_ but without Bambam

 **jinyoung:** What can we do to make him feel better

 **JB:** …

 **jinyoung:** Console Namjoon

 

***JB messaged RM***

**JB:** Hey Namjoon

 **JB:** Can I ask you something??

 

**“Move Night” chat**

**RM:** GUYS

 **RM:** SHOULD I BE SCARED

 **suga:** what happened?

 **chim:** yes.

***kook named the chat namjoon should be scared***

**RM:** I hate all of you

 **frontline:** So is date night cancelled??

 **RM:** Ofc not honey

 **RM:** I love you.

 **frontline:** <3

 **frontline:** What’s the matter sweaty???

 **kook:** AHHAHAHA SWEATY

 **frontline:** *Sweetie

 **frontline:** Fuck you Bunny teeth

***frontline changed ‘kook’ to Bunny teeth***

**Bunny Teeth:** k.

 **suga:** just tell us what’s wrong Namjoon

 **RM:** LIM FUCKING JAEBEOM TEXTED ME SAYING “Hey Namjoon. Can I ask you something??”

 **RM:** COULD HE BE ANY SCARIER

 **tae:** his chin could make an appearance

 **frontline:** What?

 **tae:** you know jabeom’s chin???

 **frontline:** No…

 **hobi:** Come on Jin, that chin is famous

 **Bunny teeth:** OH he’s alive!!!

 **Bunny teeth:** we thought you died

 **Bunny teeth:** actually… i think im the dead one- kissing yugyeom was like being in heaven

***hobi has left the conversation***

**RM:** Can someone help me?

 **suga:** just reply “sure”

 **chim:** ^^^

 **chim:** don’t be an idiot

 

**BACK AT IT AGAIN**

**JB:** Hey Namjoon

 **JB:** Can I ask you something??

 **RM:** “sure”

 **JB:** Why the quotation marks

 **RM:** Ha ha ha

 **RM:** That was an accident

 **JB:** Okay

 **JB:** How can I get Jungkook to get Bambam to invite him to hangout

 **RM:** Jesus Jaebeom

 **RM:** Why did you start the conversation with “Can I ask you something”

 **RM:** It scared the shit out of me

 **JB:** HELP ME

  
**RM:** Alright Alright

 **RM:** Let’s just trick them into meeting up?

 **JB:** How so

 **RM:** I’ll tell Kook to grab me some shit from the drug store and you’ll do the same

 **JB:** Let’s give it a try~

 **JB:** Tell Jungkook to go the drug store on the corner of *bullshit korean street name* at 7 tonight

 **RM:** Done

 

**—7PM at a drug store in Korea (what could go wrong)**

 

Laxatives. That is what Bambam was forced to get Jaebeom as punishment for stealing one of Jaebeom’s cat’s toys. As he strolled down the aisle, little did he know Jungkook was down a few aisles from him looking for a vibrator for Namjoon. All was going well until the store’s overhead lights started to flicker. Bambam takes a double take when he thinks he sees a familar coconut shaped head down an aisle when the store lights go out.

 

“ARMAGEDDON,” a women screams from the back of the store, which receives a sigh from EVERY. FUCKING. ONE.

 

“Of course,” Bambam mutters to himself before reaching for his back pocket to grab his phone, “And _of course_ I left my phone at home.”

 

As he searches for the exit Bambam runs into someone in which he bows in apology to them and heads on his way home.

 

**—meanwhile**

 

***Bunny teeth messaged gyeom***

**Bunny teeth:** UGh

 **gyeom:** bunny teeth?

 **Bunny teeth:**  jin-hyung

 **gyeom** : cute

 **Bunny teeth:** ijdhjlakdjakldjdjl

 **Bunny teeth:** i went to the convenient store to grab Namjoon a fucking vibrator but the power went out

 **gyeom:** want me to come pick you up??

 **Bunny teeth:** no

 **Bunny teeth:** it’s fine. but thank u

 **gyeom:** did you get the vibrator tho

 **Bunny teeth:** …

 **Bunny teeth:** SJFJLDDLKSHUT UP

 

 **Bunny teeth:** FUCK

 **Bunny teeth:** i just ran into someone

 **gyeom:** ahahha loser

 

—

Once Bambam arrives back at the dorms he is met by Jinyoung and Jaebeom.

 

“How was the journey?” Jinyoung says with a slight smirk.

 

“Terrible,” Bambam sighs, “The power went out, I wasn’t able to find what I was looking for, and some idiot ran into me.”

 

Bambam doesn’t notice but the couple in front of him swap looks of confusion before Jaebeom says, “How about we go out to dinner?”

 

“Just us three?”

 

“If you want,”

 

“Can we invite Yugyeom too?”

 

“Uh.. sure.”

 

**double b created a group message with gyeom, jinyoung, and JB**

**double b:** hey gyeom

 **double b:** jinyoung and jaebeom were thinking about going to dinner. are you up for it?

***JB named the conversation ‘dinner’***

**JB:** We’re planning on Myeongdong Kyoja

 **gyeom:** i would love to but i just made plans with jungkook :///

 **gyeom:** sorry

 **double b:** oh

 **double b:** that's alright

 

***jinyoung messaged JB***

**jinyoung:** FUCK

jinyoung: What do we do

 **JB:** We gotta bring in the big guns

 **jinyoung:** And what is that

 **JB:** AGUST D

 **jinyoung:** This is why I love you

 **JB:** I love you too

 

***jinyoung messaged suga***

**jinyoung:** Wake up

 **suga:** i am up?

 **jinyoung:** I need a HUGE favor

 **jinyoung:** I will owe you.

 **suga:** ok

 **suga:** what

***jinyoung changed 'suga' to AGUST D”**

**AGUST D:** the point of that was?

 **jinyoung:** Shhhh

 **jinyoung:** What do you know about Yugyeom and Jungkook

 **AGUST D:** ah, i see what this is about

 **AGUST D:** bambam

 **AGUST D:** and i’m in.

 **AGUST D:** jungkook was telling us a few minutes ago about his date with yugyeom tonight

 **AGUST D:** they plan on going bowling

 **jinyoung:** Can you somehow convince or blackmail Jungkook to back out of the date?

 **AGUST D:** i can try my best

 **jinyoung:** Thank you

 **AGUST D:** if this works you have to get jaebeom to work on a song with me

 **jinyoung:** easy

 

(Yugyeom and Bambam’s EASSSSYYYY~~~ can be heard in the distance if you listen hard enough)

 

***AGUST D messaged Bunny teeth***

**AGUST D:** HEY! bunny teeth

 **AGUST D:** i need your help

 **Bunny teeth:** what for?

 **AGUST D:** tonight taehyung was suppose to help me with some back up vocals for a song i was working on, but the bitch is sick so can you help me

 **Bunny teeth:** i would LOVE to, but remember i have a date with gyeomie?

 **AGUST D:** oh well… i guess i’ll ask jimin instead

 **AGUST D:** he has better vocals anyways

 **Bunny teeth:** I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE DOING

 **Bunny teeth:** STOP THAT

_AGUST D is typing…_

**Bunny teeth:** FINE

 **Bunny teeth:** i’ll do it

 **AGUST D:** you won’t regret this

 

**“Dinner” chat**

**gyeom:** oh lol nvm

 **gyeom:** kook already had previous arrangements with yoongi

 **gyeom:** i guess i’m in

 **double b:** aw yes

 **JB:** Lil’ meow meow

 **double b:** what?

 **JB:** Yoongles

 **jinyoung:** :)

 **gyeom:** how about we just ditch them and go to dinner ourselves?

 **gyeom:** what do you say bam?

 **double b:** sounds perfect.

***gyeom kicked JB and jinyoung from the group chat***

 

Jaebeom looks away from his phone before smiling, managing to get out a, “Success.”

 

“We did it,” Jinyoung gives Jaebeom a quick peck on the cheek which causes Jabeom to smile even bigger.

 

“You’re beautiful,”

 

“I love you,”

 

“I love you more.”

 

—8:30 pm

***eldest hyung messaged otter jae***

**eldest hyung:** i thought you said gyeom and jungkook were a thing

 **otter jae:** They are

 **otter jae:** Yugyeom told me he and Jungkook kissed and that they were going out on a date tonight/

 **eldest hyung:** oof

 **eldest hyung:** well then this better not be gyeom and bam because i just wanted some fucking udon and i see them making out at myeongdong kyoja

 **otter jae:** Tea

 **eldest hyung:** do you even know what that means?

 **otter jae:** YEAH

 **eldest hyung:** what does it mean?

 **otter jae:** How are you the oldest again?

 **otter jae:** You just bully all of us

 **otter jae:** But nobody knows™ since you’re the “quiet one”

 **eldest hyung:** wow SUNSHINE POPPED

***otter changed ‘eldest hyung’ to Bully***

**Bully:** love you too youngjae

 

**“revenge on bangtan bitches” chat**

**double b:** alright gyeom and i had a chat during dinner

 **Bully:** lol “chat”

 **double b:** what is that suppose to mean

 **Bully:** nothing

 **double b:** anyways. we think the bangtan bitches are gonna attack us soon and we need to protect ourselves

 **traitor:** y’all are too over dramatic

 **jinyoung** : WHO tf are bully and traitor

 **otter jae:** Bully is Mark

 **JB:** Jackson is traitor

 **jinyoung:** Tell me why

 **jinyoung:** Actually don’t.

 **traitor:** JB thinks I love 9 percent more than you guys

 **traitor:** WHICH IS NOT TRUE

 **JB:** LIAR

 **JB:** HOW CAN ONE NOT LOVE CAI XUKUN OR ZHU ZHENGTING??

 **otter jae:** JABEOME HAVE YOU NOT SEEN CHENGCHENG THOUGHjcdJKCJ

 **Bully:** yanjun??

 **Bully:** People WAKE UP

 **traitor:** HAJI-HAJIMA

 **gyeom:** y’all sleeping on nongnong???

 **double b:** WHY DO ALL OF YOU FUCKERS GET OFF TRACK SO EASILY

 **gyeom:** tell me why I like kissing you again

 **double b:** …

 **gyeom:** heh

 **gyeom:** FUCK

 **Bully:** WHAT ABOUT JUNGKOOK

 **Bully:** YOU CANT DO THAT TO HIM

 **traitor:** There’s a simple solution

 **double b:** which is?

 **traitor:** Gyeom, break it off with Jungkook

 **gyeom:** no

 **traitor:** Or with Bambam

 **gyeom:** uH

***double b has left the group chat***

 

**— end**

 

***chim messaged tae***

**chim:** did you ever like jungkook?

 **tae:** ofc. he’s one of my closest friends

 **chim:** i mean _like_ like

 **tae:** oh

 **tae:** um why?

 **chim:** answer the question

 **tae:** yes

 **chim:** HEHEHEHEH thanks

 **tae:** FUCKER WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO

 **chim:** youngjae and i bet on it

 **chim:** you won me 20,000 won

 **tae:** asshat

 

**— another extra because C H R I S T M A S (if you celebrate it)**

"JINYOUNG????"

 

"Yes, honey," 

 

"WHY IS YOONGI AT THE DOOR SAYING HE'S 'READY FOR THAT COLLAB'?"

 

"Shit. I forgot to tell you,"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> love a good cliff hanger and yugyeom... please don't fuck this up.


	6. Fish! They are Everywhere.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Commence the Bangtan prank, but it sucks... Jungkook think outside the tank, not IN it. Silly goose.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> when the texting AU slowly becomes more written and the author didn’t plan on that happening, so she’s self conscience about the written portion
> 
> ☆
> 
> here’s a reminder for everyone: 
> 
> RM - Kim Namjoon  
> frontline - Kim Seokjin  
> AGUST D - Min Yoongi  
> hobi - Jung Hoseok  
> chim - Park Jimin  
> tae - Kim Taehyung  
> Bunny teeth - Jeon Jungkook
> 
> JB - Im Jaebeom  
> Bully - Mark Tuan  
> traitor- Jackson Wang  
> jinyoung - Park Jinyoung  
> otter jae - Choi Youngjae  
> double b - BamBam  
> gyeom - Kim Yugyeom

 

***Bunny teeth messaged chim and tae***

**Bunny teeth:** did you get it?

 **chim:** we are right now

 **chim:** how many did you say again?

 **Bunny teeth:** 100 golfish, 75 mollys

 **Bunny teeth:** mollies??? IDK

 **Bunny teeth:** a shit ton of tetras

 **Bunny teeth:** get as many fish as you can with the money i gave you

 **tae:** you gave us ₩1,005,345.00 (about 900 USD)???

 **tae** : how tf did you get all this

 **Bunny teeth:** you don’t need to know

 **Bunny teeth:** make sure to get 2 turtles

 **chim:** can we name them???

 **tae:** ^^^^

 **Bunny teeth:** sure

 **chim:** i vote for timothy and robert

 **tae:** what the fuck jimin

***tae changed ‘chim’ to timothy***

**timothy:** was the really necessary taehyung?

 **Bunny teeth:** just get the fish guys

 **tae:** we are. calm down

 

Once the two came home Jungkook called everyone into the kitchen for an “emergency meeting”.

 

“Tell me again why we are listening to the maknae??” Yoongi asks right away before Jungkook can even begin.

 

“Because of _his_ friends our house was trashed,” Seokjin adds, “I still find cornstarch in places I thought cornstarch would never be.”

 

“WOULD EVERYONE JUST LISTEN TO ME. I NEED TO EXPLAIN THE PRANK,”

 

Jimin rolled his eyes which doesn’t go unnoticed by Jungkook.

 

“I SAW THAT HYUNG,”

 

“WELL I WAS BORN IN BUSAN FIRST,” Jimin retorts.

 

“What does that have to do with anything?” Namjoon whispers to Seokjin, who is besides him.

 

Jin replies, “Literally nothing,”

 

“Can you fuckers stop arguing?” Hoseok interupts by throwing one the many bags sitting on the counter at them.

 

“HOSEOK NO,” Taehyung and Jimin scream in unison, “THERE’S FISH IN THAT BAG.”

 

Fortunately a panicked Taehyung managed to push past everyone and catch the bag, but the fish seemed a little panicked, so he left the room to tend them.

 

After a few moments of stunned silence Jungkook claps which grabs everyone’s attention, “Alright, that was a perfect transition to what the prank will be consisted of.” Since everyone still seems shaken up Jungkook uses this to his advantage. “We’re gonna sneak into Yugyeom and his friends dorm and fill their showers with fish and water of course. So they’ll be forced to figure out how to save the fish, but also get them out.”

 

“That’s a terrible plan, Jungkook.”

 

“If you don’t do it, I will hurt you.”

 

**— @ the got7 household**

 

“Alright, Yugyeom said the spare pair of keys was under the pot outside,” Jungkook states while peeking through the window to make sure no one is home. Yugyeom has told him the previous day that they had a meeting with _the_ JYP for the whole day.

 

Once Jungkook receives the key from Jimin they unlock the door and slowly creep into the house looking for the bathrooms.

 

“Okay, there four bathrooms in the house, so that means we should split into 4 teams,” When received with no replies he looks back at the six members standing behind him, eyes on him and asks, “What?”

 

“We’re waiting for you to tell us the teams,” Hoseok pipes up.

 

“Oh... um. Namjoon?” Jungkook says nervously while looking around.

 

“That’s my name,”

 

“You’re the leader. Make the teams,”

 

“I’m not leading _this_ though,”

 

“Oh...kay,” Jungkook takes a moment to think, “Jimin and Taehyung, Namjoon and Yoongi, Hoseok and Jin, and I’ll do a bathroom by myself. Everyone take 5 bags of fish. Who wants the master bathroom?”

 

“We’ll take it,” Jimin and Taehyung shout at the same time, snickering.

 

“Alright, let’s get this bread,”

 

“Please don’t ever say that again,” Yoongi glares.

 

**☆Yoongi and Namjoon☆**

 

“Okay, so how the fuck are we suppose to do this?” Yoongi questions the moment they arrive in the bathroom.

 

“I have no clue,” Namjoon states while pulling out his phone, “Google doesn’t have any results on how to fill a SHOWER UP WITH WATER,”

 

“I’m going to kill Jungkook,”

 

“What if we just fill the bathtub with water instead?” Namjoon states.

 

“Sure, I don’t care,”

 

After filling the bathtub up with hot water the two just waited for the water to cool down to room temperature, so they could place the fish in without them dying. While they waited Namjoon decided on telling the story of how he and Seokjin met.

 

“Jin and I met in the most basic way. We met in high school, physics to be exact. I thought he was the most beautiful man I had ever seen, so I asked the teacher to move me next to him since I was “distracted” by my old partner. Sorry, Mingjae. After two weeks of talking to him he asked me to study with him at a coffee shop. That study date went terribly. I broke my coffee cup and he spilled his coffee on me, but because of that terrible date we knew we were perfect for each other. I asked him for redo date because I thought I blew it, but instead he kissed me and said, ‘We don’t need a redo. I wouldn’t exchange this evening for anything.’ I love him.”

 

By the time the story was over the water was room temperature and they started to place the fish bags in the water.

 

“Namjoon. Will you turn all the heat on? Also set a timer for ten minutes. We can’t let the fish out of the bags until the water temperature in the bags are the same as the bathtub water,”

 

“How do you know so much about fish?”

 

Yoongi shrugs, “I don’t know I go to the aquarium a lot,”

 

“YOU.”

 

“Me?”

 

“YOU WERE THE ONE TO BLACKMAIL EVERYONE INTO GOING TO THE AQUARIUM,”

 

“A little late,” Yoongi face palms.

 

**☆Jungkook☆**

 

He’s the golden maknae. Do we even need to question how he filled a shower up and put fish in it?

 

**☆Hoseok and Seokjin☆**

 

When Hoseok and Seokjin first arrive in the bathroom the first thing they realize was it was really small, “ I guess we found Mark’s bathroom.” Jin exhales with his hands on his hips.

 

“How do we start?”

 

“Duct tape. We tape all the cracks and slivers the best we can,”

 

“But what about the water…?”

 

“Oh… ha yeah…” Jin nervously laughs and heads into the shower to turn the water on. “Alright. Tape up, baby.”

 

“Please don’t ever call me that again,”

 

Once the shower was filled up all the way the two were ready to put the fish in, “Hoseok, can you pass the fish?”

 

Hoseok holds out the bag for Seokjin to grab when something unexpected falls out of the bag. “AHHHHHHHHH, WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT,” Hoseok screams at the top of his lungs causing the object to run frantically in the closed room.

 

Jin was known to be frightened quite easily, so seeing a dark green and black orb flying across the ground caused him to jump up onto the sink. “HOSEOK!!!!!!!!!”

 

After a minute of the couple screaming and crying for help someone barged into the bathroom, “What the fuck is happening in here?”

 

“JUNGKOOK, thank God you came something is MOVING and it’s not a FISH BECAUSE FISH DON’T RUN AROUND ON LAND,”

 

“Can you guys calm the down?”

 

“‘Can you guys calm down?’” Jin mocked while screaming at Jungkook, “THERE’S SOMETHING ALIVE IN THIS BATHROOM WITH US,”

 

“It’s just a turtle. I think this one is Robert,”

 

“A Tur-turtle??” Hoseok’s voice shook, “Why do we have a turtle?”

 

“I was gonna put them in the toliet. I didn’t know you grabbed the bag with the turtles in it.”

 

“TURTLES?! THERE’S ANOTHER ONE?”

 

Jungkook searches through the bags until he finds the one with the other turtle, “Poor guy. You guys scared it so much, he’s hiding in his shell,” Jungkook takes the two turtles and heads out of the bathroom. Before he exits he turns around and asks, ‘How are you two going to put the fish in the shower if it’s already taped up and filled?”

 

“Fuck,”

 

**☆Jimin and Taehyung☆**

 

“Wanna raid their bedroom before we start?”

 

“Of course,”

 

Once in the JJP bedroom the pair started to raid the drawers, sheets, closet, everything; looking for something juicy.

 

After searching for a good three minutes Taehyung gasps and shouts to Jimin, “I found something,”

 

Jimin quickly hurries to wear Taehyung is standing and peers over his shoulder to see what he is looking at it. It’s a picutre of Bambam and Yugyeom as children (about age 7) together in the bathtub. “Oh my God, Jungkook’s going to love this.”

 

“Aren’t they a little old to be in the bathtub together?”

 

“Eh. They probably still do this together to this day,” Shrugs Jimin. He then takes the photo from Taehyung’s hands and puts it in his pocket. “Prank war ammo,” Taehyung opens his mouth to say something; Jimin doesn’t seem to notice and continues, “Could you make a few copies of these in photography?”

 

“I take film, dumb fuck,”

 

“Fine. I’ll do it myself,” Jimin says then turns a cold shoulder toTaehyung.

 

“I never wanted to participate in this?”

 

“Come on,” Jimin nudges, “Let’s just get these fish in the shower.”

 

**“namjoon should be scared” chat**

**Bunny** **teeth:** aright. everyone should be about done, so meet me in the living room

 **hobi:** Oh… XD

 **hobi:** Jin-hyung, yoongi, and i already left

 **Bunny teeth:** tf

 **AGUST D:** didn’t know we were suppose to stay jeon

 **Bunny teeth:** the people who are still here come to the living room

 **tae:** well.. um

 **tae:** chim and i already left

 **RM:** WHAT THE FUCK GUYS

 **RM:** No one asked me to come with them?

 **Bunny teeth:** namjoon get your ass to the living room

 **RM:** What did you just say to me

 **Bunny teeth:** namjoon- _hyung_ get your ass to the living room

 **RM:** Yeah...

 **RM:** I left

 

—

Youngjae was the first one back at the house. Being half asleep he ignored the wet spots on the carpet and went straight for his room. He decides to take a quick shower and heads into the bathroom. Once in the bathroom he quickly undresses and throws his clothes over the bathtub, as always. A quick realization sets into Youngjae when he realized his phone was still in the coat pocket.

 

 **“revenge on bangtan bitches”** chat

 **otter jae:** GUYS

 **otter jae:** COME UP HERE ASAP

 **jinyoung:** I just sat down

 **Bully:** did coco eat your muffins again?

 **otter jae:** NO

 **otter jae:** SOMEONE JUST COME HERE

  
**traitor:** What’s wrong

 **JB:** Jinyoung and I are in the middle of something

 **gyeom:** EW

 **JB:** Not like that Yugyeom

 **gyeom:** THAN WHAT

 **JB:** We’re cleaning up our bedroom

 **JB:** It’s like someone broke in, but nothings gone

 

“JAEBEOM,” Jinyoung screams from he bathroom, “FISH”

 

Jaebeom throws his phone a little bit too far, so it flies off the bed as he runs into the bathroom. “What wro-“ Jaebeom stops mid sentence when he sees the shower. Neither one knowing what to say, so they just stand there in shock.

 

Moments later Mark comes running in, “My shower is filled up to the brim with water, my toilet has one hundred fucking fish in it, fish are in Youngjae's tub, turtles, and it smells like a fucking aquarium,” Mark pauses to take a breath before continuing, “I swear to God we are going to get them back.”

 

Mark dashes away about as fast as he came without realizing Jinyoung and Jaebeom’s situation.

 

“I’m with Mark,” Jinyoung finally says.

 

"Me too," 

 

"Let's start planning,"

\--

  
***gyeom messaged double b***

 **gyeom:** hey

 **double b:** hey.

 **gyeom:** seriously bambam

 **double b** : what?

 **gyeom:** nvm, i wanted to talk

 **gyeom:** i miss you

 **double b:** i bet you miss jungkook more.

 **gyeom:** you’re my best friend

 **gyeom:** we’ve known each other since forever

 **double b:** gyeom, i like you a lot. more than just a friend, but i think i ruined things between us

 

Yugyeom hadn’t replied in over 15 minutes and Bambam was feeling sadder every second. Bambam powered down his phone, so he didn’t have to look at it any longer. Right when he was about to turn the lights off in his room he heard a knock on his door. The minute he opened it he was engulfed in the warmest hug he had every received.

 

“Yugyeom,”

 

“Bambam,”

 

**cliché i know :) sometimes it be like that— end**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yugbam is soft i shed a tear...


End file.
